leadership

during our college / career prayer meeting last night, which i led, the following occurred to me: i don't want people to think of me as a leader. i do want people to follow me (when i'm following G-d, that is). strange thinking for me. even acknowledging that i sometimes have something worth following is a difficult step for me to take. but during the M05 conference i noticed interesting trends regarding this. the kids didn't usually respond to me because i was a "leader," in fact a few times they forgot that i was one. however, they seemed to follow me on certain things. the late-night prayer on the last night (3.30am-5am) was an example. it was very strange for me to be leading a little "following" of four people to this prayer meeting, but they were following me, and since i was following the L-rd's leading in that moment, it seemed right that it should be so. during the prayer meeting last night i found myself feeling very much not like a leader, but like someone who was encouraging the discussion and prayers. it occurred to me that this is always what i strive for when leading prayer meetings. somehow that very sense led me to give some "parting shots" about increasing intercession, as it was my last meeting before i'm gone in belarus for a few weeks. it IS my prayer that people DO increase intercession. but not because the "leader" of the prayer meeting said so, but because it's a good thing to do in this place and time. i think it's something that G-d has been talking to me about, and it's worth it for others to follow in that direction. i was reminded of this article that i read a few months ago: Kingdom Leadership in the Postmodern Era by Leonard Hjalmarson. A bit wordy but good reading for the bus.