keywriter.

devotion.
thirteen.

My healer, i ask that you deliver me from these dark thoughts and fears which plague me. All the power that they have is to fill me with bitterness, with suspicion, with that which feels hard and cold in my depths. As i witness what we do to ourselves, i feel these things trying to harden my heart to stone, trying to freeze and contract me, trying to collapse me and my focus more on myself, on my own sufferings and my own actions that bring suffering.

But you would have me with a heart of soft clay. In an environment that encourages me to grit my teeth and tense my muscles, you would have me open and ready to your shaping and your instruction. You would have me give under the gentle touch of your fingers.

When i feel these fingers i rejoice... it is my desire to be in your hands. I know that even through experiences that are against me, i learn. You are the master of all my circumstances, and you have promised that, as i do love you, you will bring good for my sake out of all things. Your love for me is great enough to conquer all that is wrongly done to me and by me, and to conquer all the feelings these things create that would seek to pull me from you.

Show me what lessons you would have me learn from each instance in my daily life, from each time i do something or something is done to me. Grant me the patience needed to listen to your voice in every situation... the understanding to discern what you have to teach me throughout my life... the willingness to obey what i hear spoken (from your lips and through my experiences)... the ability to carry out your desire... and as you work, continue to increase your desire in me so that your desire is my desire.

Always may my attention be on you, and not consumed by that which would distract and destroy. You always turn your ear to me when i call on you, so let me always turn my eyes to you and remember and declare your name in all that i do.

For you are truly more lovely than all else upon which i could dwell. You are my teacher, and you use my life as a lesson to guide that life to yourself all the more. You deliver me from that which binds me, and you instead draw me ever toward yourself, in your great love for me.

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